Hopeless

Few days ago, I was browsing for something to read. I was bored that day.
I ended up in some kind of group blog. I don't remember what group it is but it has many followers.
I began to think that that group was really famous.
I wondered how the owner of that blog managed to get a lot of followers.
Yeah, a group. Of course.

Now I don't wonder again.
Because of by not having any followers, your secrets are safe.
My blog is my secret basket.
I'm glad that I don't have followers.

Jadi...
Sebenarny alasan g upload new post subuh2 gne krna, ptama g ga bs tidur. Kdua, ada ssuatu yg bkin hati g glisah n sdih yg akhrny bkin g nangis.
Sbenarny udh dr td siang g kganggu ma uneasy feeling ne.
Mungkin g agak kkanak2an y.
Dpt nile yg lbh rndah drpd tmn2 g, bkin g sdih ma glisah.
Glisah krn g ga bs dlm tu plajaran dan sedih krn ga da 1 pun dr tmn g yg sdr atz kgelisahan g.

G mau nangis lagi ne kyny.
Skarang g dalam state yg sgt hopeless.
G jg takut dan terlebih lagi, g orang yg susah membuka diri.
G ga butuh nasihat tentang gimana g harus blajar karena g tau.
G cuma butuh orang yang bisa bilang "semua bakal bae2 aja" dan mau nemenin g yg lagi nangis n sedih ne.
Sbenarny g tau kalo g ga ngmg orang ga kan da yg tau... Tapi mungkin udah g bawa dari kecil. Dimana apa yang g inginkan ga pnah didenger.
Disaat g mengatakan yg sjujur2ny malah ga dianggap srius.
Bahkan g dpmaluin, dktawain saat g ngmg jujur.
Kemampuan g buat mengungkapkan perasaan g dah hilang dan g ga tw gimana carany utk mndapatkan tu lagi.
G mulai mrasa was2 n malu jika ngmg yg sjujurny.

Cuma disini g bisa ngungkapin smua.
G slalu myakinkan dri sndri bahwa smua akan bae2 ja...
Adakah orang yang mau bilang gt k g...?
Myakinkan g klo smua akn bae2 ja...?

Oh Tuhan...
How can I live by myself...?
I need answers...